Fear · Goals · Motivation

New month, fresh start

Well, here we are in August, it seems crazy. July is my favorite month and it always seems to go faster every year. I normally have great visions to sit down and actually plan goals for each month, and usually it never happens. The last probably 4 months have been crazy for everyone and I have definitely lost sight of goals.

With not really being able to go and do anything, I haven’t had plans so who really would need a planner. I still worked 5 days a week, and all but for a month, went to the office so nothing really changed for me. Other then my social calendar was pretty empty with events being cancelled. I was very happy that we were able to go on our planned summer vacation.

I think the time away was needed, and it was kind of a mind reset almost. I had started to get back to my morning routine before vacation, but it had not really stuck yet. When I got back, I jumped back into working our like I had, and my body like it does told me that was a mistake. I had to take a good week off workouts and when I did start back up, I had to take it slow. This week was the week I restarted and had to slow it down.

I was recommended a book by my coach, which I will discuss more when I cam done with the book, and it just remind me it was time to get myself back on track and start reaching for goals again.

I am not one that believes that you need to have a new month to have a fresh start, but think it is  perfect timing that I was having these thoughts when it is the first day of a new month. It is fitting and I am going to run with it and see where August takes me.

The key to being successful building habits is starting small. I am going to start by doing the following 3 things:

  1. Writing down my goals every morning.
  2. Morning routine: Read daily devotional, journal, prayer, reading, writing down 3 priorities to get done for that day and my workout.
  3. Writing one blog post each week.

Those will be my steps for August. At the end of the month, I will evaluate how I have done and add something different once I get those 3 habits established.

So far today I have gotten everything done on that list. Which means I will now have time to relax and do some reading for fun or some other activity that brings me joy.

Being an adult can sometimes not be exciting with things like having to pay bills. I have learned though, if I put those not so fun tasks at the top of my list and take care of them right away, I have more time to relax and do the other fun things that come with being an adult.

It is all about mindset and perspective, and I had forgotten that until today. Time to reset my mind and refocus and see what amazing things August 2020 holds for me!

Fear · Motivation

World Cancer Day 2020

Today is world cancer day, but for many people everyday is world cancer day. It does not just end or go away after today. I work with pediatric cancer so I see cancer everyday, I also had cancer myself.

Next week marks 6 years from hearing the words myself “you have cancer”. Yes, I did hear those exact word because I remember hearing what my diagnosis and specifically saying “does that mean I have cancer”. I think for me I had to hear the actual words to be able to process what was next for me.

I was lucky, if you can call having cancer lucky. I was young, healthy and I had a cancer that was very treatable. I had 6 months of chemotherapy, which was not easy. I had a few side effects and the hardest part, I lost my hair. I was proud of myself for getting through that and still managed to continue to work full time. I only missed 1 day during treatment and a few at the very end when I was in the hospital for a few days.

Again I say I was ‘lucky”, although the treatments where not and there was many treatment days I really did not want to go too. I would just get feeling better and back to normal and it would be time for treatment and to start the cycle all over again. I got through it.

Today, I had my routine follow up with my oncologist. My labs all looks awesome, other then I need to drink more water. He said especially with me training for my half marathon I need to get more water in. So cheers as I raise my water glass to take a drink of water. My exam was good as well so I will have another follow up in 6 months, after that one we may change and do yearly follow ups.

I see my oncologist for both the Lymphoma and for my low immune system, which I get monthly infusions for. He will have to manage those infusions and for that I will only need to see him yearly. I cannot even remember when I had only yearly visits with a doctor so when that happens it will be another huge milestone.

There is one lab test still pending, it takes a few days for those results to come back. It is a level that when my cancer was active it was elevated, so there is a piece of me that has that in the back of my mind, but I will not allow myself to focus on it. I have been feeling amazing and all my other labs are great so I feel pretty confident it will be undetectable when it does come back.

If it does come back high, it will depend on how high. I have had it come back slightly elevated and we check in a month and its back to negative. If it is not good news, I will deal with that when it comes but my focus today is celebrating I am now 5.5 years in remission. Yes, relapse is always possible but each visit I am in remission is a gift and I am extremely grateful for that gift and will not take that lightly.

World Cancer Day may just be a day for some people, but if you were effected by cancer in some way every day is World Cancer Day! Today I remember all those that have lost their battles with cancer, those that are currently fighting cancer and those like me grateful enough to have beaten cancer.

If you are currently battling keep pushing and no your not alone there are many others out there and we all fight together!

No One Fights Alone!!!


Fear · Goals · Motivation · Uncategorized

Be intentional with your time

Another book reference for you, this one comes from “How to Get Sh*t Done” by Erin Falconer. I believe I reference this book before, but this week I was reading about the importance of time tracking.

We all say we do not have enough time in the day, truth is we all have the same 24 hours in the day. It is more about how we use our time and what we prioritize in our day that causes us not to be able to get what we want done. How much time are you spending mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram? Be honest here, I myself are just as guilty of this so I have my hand raised too.

I challenged myself to track my time this week and see where exactly I was spending it. With my personal time I did do pretty good, I did notice that in the morning, I would spend a lot of time sitting on the couch before working out. What I was doing with this time was scrolling social media, checking my Fitbit app to see how I slept, and watching TV. I was drinking my coffee and eating my pre workout meal on my run days but the majority of the morning time was being wasted.

It is still a work in progress but I did manage to not turn the TV on right away when I get up. This has allowed me the time to drink my coffee while I ready my journal book by Bob Goff, my 3 minute women devotion book and sit in silence even for a few deep breathes. It is not easy to change habits so I am celebrating the small win here. Next week I will continue with these 3 things and add in writing in my planner what the 3 big things I need to do for that day. I may even not allow myself to sit on the couch at all (it is an idea anyways).

I know that I give myself plenty of time in the morning to get to my workout on time and not feel rushed. The key is I need to be more intentional with my time and this will happen. I have had to rush on my run days because of all the time I waste.

Just like starting a day with a routine is important, ending a day with one is just as important. I believe my post from last week went more into detail on this. While I still have my few chores that I have to do every night, I mean for some odd reason my cats and husband think they need supper hehe. I am adding a personal routine to help me relax before going to sleep.

My night routine looks something like this, I come home and try and take my make up off before doing anything else and change into PJs of course. The last few days I have rubbed a little coconut oil on my face, then use my Mary Kay under eye cream and night lotion. If I have already at supper I use my floss picks to floss my teeth, brush my teeth and use mouth wash (working on brushing and flossing my teeth 2 times a day). I then put a little lotion on my hands and head to bed.

I sit cross legged in my bed, pull out my planner to do the rest of my time tracking and if I have something I cannot forget for the next day write it in right away. I then turn to medication. I have been meditating to the angels and my guardian angel, a practice Gabrielle Bernstein talks about in both her books I have listened too “The Universe Has Your Back” and “Super Attractor” (both I highly recommend in audio for sure).  I do this for a few minutes and then say my nightly prayers. When I am done with both of those I then write in my journal anything that came to me during meditation and make sure to write things that I am grateful for. Gratitude is the number 1 thing that relaxes me at night.

I have only done this night routine a few nights, I missed in Friday night and I could completely tell that it made my start to my Saturday the way it was. The one thing at night I do need to improve is after my night routine, I need to put my phone down right away and just sleep. We are all a work in progress of course.

I know, my routine is a little different and it may not be your jam. That is totally cool, what you need to take away from it is this: it is important to find a morning and night routine that works for you. If you have a routine it will help you be more intentional with your time and your day. I am seeing, that with routines, I am more relaxed and I feel like I have more energy and time in the day. It is almost like I added more hours to my day even though I know that is not possible.

Starting routines are extremely hard, so do not give up. If something is not working find out what it is and adjust course. It took me many years to get into the habit of working out in the morning. I tried different times of the day until one just clicked and it felt natural. I knew that meant it was meant to be and that I finally found the habit that would help me stay accountable with working out.

Need help setting a routine, message me and I would love to chat and help you get started with a routine.

Morning Routine Goal:

  • Alarm goes off (do not hit snooze).
  • Put on workout cloths right away.
  • Make bullet proof coffee and pre-workout breakfast if its run day.
  • Do not turn on the TV or scroll social media
  • Write 3 main goals for the day in planner
  • Get out devotional books
  • Sit in silence and deep breathe
  • Get workout started by 4:45am on run days
  • Shower after workout (listen to audio book while getting ready)
  • Floss and Brush teeth

Night Routine Goal:

  • Remove makeup
  • Under-eye cream and face cream
  • Floss and Brush teeth
  • Time tracking in planner
  • Meditation
  • Prayer
  • Journal
  • Do not look at phone after journaling


Remember: Change takes time so be patient with yourself!!!

Fear · Goals · Motivation · Uncategorized

Embrace the training

Half marathon training is HARD! I think I now know why I did not train last year.

Today was long run day, since I did not run last week I repeated so had a 10K race to do. I thought I would start there and push myself to go longer and do 8-9 miles.

Of course, my girls woke me up at 3:45am again so that right there did not help my day to get started on the right foot. I tried to sleep off and on on the couch until finally getting up around 6:30am. Had my coffee, ate some food then made the hubby breakfast and off to the treadmill I went.

The run started off okay, my speed was going well and the first few miles were not too bad. I began to struggle to find something to watch, which caused me to focus more on the dreaded numbers. I felt like I should have been doing way better and watching the miles go up so slow just took a toll on my mind.

The one think I can say, is I stayed on the treadmill and I got to the 6.1 miles. I walked way more then I am proud of and felt very defeated in myself.

More important than the running and not the best time is actually what I did after that. I allowed myself to be disappointed and then I knew I needed to fix my attitude and fast.

This week I had focused on working on a morning and night routine. We went out to celebrate a friends birthday and when I got home I did not due the last few things I should have in my new night routine. Which I believe is why I was not as motivated to do my morning routine. Since I did not do that before my run, it did not set me up for success.

After my running and allowing myself the few minutes to be discourage during my stretching. I got right to work on what I knew I needed to do. I got out me new 365-day journal reading book by Bob Goff. If you have never heard of him or this book you should check it out. Since I hate to wait, I got mine at Barns and Nobles but it is also on Amazon of course.

I did my 3 minute devotional for women, took a few deep breaths in silence then went and took a shower. I listed to “The Universe Has Your Back” by Gabrielle Bernstein. The book helps you to align yourself with the universe and has meditation practices in it to help. There is just something soothing and calming about her voice and the cleansing of a hot shower that does wonderful things for the mood.

I had a different post in mind for this week, which I still plan to write, but I felt strongly pulled to share this experience of both a disappointing run day as well as the 3 things I did to get out of my funk. After Doing my devotions, that few deep breaths in silence, listening to a positive audiobook and a cleansing shower I feel ready to take on the rest of my day.

The biggest thing I want you to take away from this post is this: Not everyday will be great, not every moment will be great. The important thing is to find something that will help you change a bad mood into a good one and not ruin a whole day. There is always something to be grateful for in each and every day.

This training for a half marathon is tough, but I know I can do it and when I get done I will be both stronger and so proud of myself for doing it. It was one bad run day and I will make the next one a better one!

Embrace the Training

Fear · Goals · Motivation

You do not have to “DO IT ALL”

I have had a many conversations in the past about feeling overwhelmed with all the things that need to be done in a day. I am talking all the life stuff and how you find time for it all. I hear all the time I do not have time to _______ fill in the blank. Many times that blank is workout, or eat healthy or even sleep.

I do not care what your life looks like, you could be a stay at home mom with 5 children, or you could be a working parent with 2 kids, or you could be like me a working wife that has fur babies. Are all lives and responsibilities may look a little different but the one thing we do have in common is a full schedule.

This week on top of all my routine nightly chores I did errands, worked out all 5 mornings, found time to go to church to get together with the sewing group for the first time, had a zoom call with my confidence group and even went to bed at 7:30pm the other night.

What is my secret, I prioritize things that are most important to me. I believe it was Mel Robbins that I heard say plan a quit time each day. I have started applying this to chores in the evening. I was starting to notice that I would get myself very stressed in the evening trying to do it all on my to-do list and would feel guilty if I did not get it all done. I sometimes would not go do activities I was interested in or invited too because of it.

I started each day picking things that I know need to be done each night which tend to be making supper, feeding the kitties, filling the humidifiers, packing lunches and scooping litter boxes. If there is extra time before my “quitting time” I do another task that is on the list but I never let it stress me out if I do not get to it. That may mean there is a lot of kitty fur on my floor, dirty dishes in the sink, clean dishes in the dishwasher and laundry in the dryer. It will all still be there when I get to it the next day, and I figure if God does not grant me another day if someones first thought is “did you see she left dirty dishes in the sink” I think they are the ones with the problems. Life is way too short and precious to care about dirty dishes.

The nights that I have an activity that I want to prioritize my list of things I get done maybe even smaller. My quit time may change and I may have to push my bedtime to accommodate. The key is to knowing what is the most important thing that needs to be done and let the others wait to take the pressure off ourselves that us women are very good at putting on ourselves.

Another thing that has helped me tremendously is knowing what time of the day I work best. I had always been a night person, but I have now changed to a morning person. Since I am a morning person it is also why I have such an early bedtime especially during the week. Working out, more specifically half marathon training is important to me. I have learned that the only way I stay committed to that and constant is to get my workouts done in the morning. Once my day is started it is much harder for me to get my working done, especially during the week. I am tired by the end of my day and if I put my workout off until then, I do not have as much energy during my day and I am too tired by the time I get home too get it done. So, I wake up some mornings at 4:15am to drink my coffee and have a little food before getting a workout in.

One of my biggest pet peeves has to be people saying I am to “busy”. We all have a lot of things going on in life, I do not know a single person who is not “busy”. If something is truly important to you, you will find a way. I have a full scheduled but for the most part I am in full control of it and if I really want to do something I will. I am learning to schedule time to get things done that are truly important to me and saying no sometimes when things do not inline with my goals.

As I said above, I am a busy wife that works full time, has 4 fur babies to take care of, a house to run with cooking and cleaning, at minimum a monthly infusion that is 3 hours and other routine medical appointments. I still manage to find time to see friends, spend time with my husband, attend bible study, write on my blog one time a week, working on writing my book, working out and work on my hobbies.

I am not perfect and have moments where I feel overwhelmed with that, I then remind myself that I am choosing to do all of these things and somethings on my schedule can wait. Even right now, I still have some Christmas decorations up, did not get them all down when I took the tree down a few weeks ago. I have so much dust in my house I could write my name in it and I currently have a load of cloths in the washer that needs to go into the dryer. I have prioritized that Friday nights will be my writing night so while I finish this post the cloths will be in the washer, I am sure they will still be waiting for me when I get up in a minutes. The dust will still be there tomorrow when I hope to have a little time after my run, and if someone wants to judge me on my nativity scene still being up they certainly can.

When I really sat down and thought about all the things that caused me so much stress, I came to this one simple conclusion:

I was the only person putting all the pressure on me.

I had no one to blame for all the pressure I was feeling but myself. I had no one telling me I had to do all of these things, in my head I felt that in order to be the best wife, cat mommy, and women in general I needed to do all of it every night and have this perfect house. Truth is this, the only thing I need to do is take care of myself first. If I do not take care of myself, then I will not have anything left to give to others.

I have added one other trick in the last few weeks. It is based on a concept in the book How to Get Shit Done by Erin Falconer. I believe she words is as the Big 3. I look at it as I am picking 3 big goals I want to focus on right now and that is all. Right now I am focusing on half marathon training, writing (which includes my blog and my book) and connecting with others (which I have been doing by going to bible study and sewing). For everything I say yes too I think if it is in line with these 3 goals and if its not, then I figure out if it is something that is worth making a priority.

So far it has worked well. I have been able to stay committed to getting weekly posts done and writing on my book weekly. I have been training by running 3 days a week, which going to bed early has helped my training. I also move things around and go to bed early different days when I know its week of bible study and I will be up later. Its all about balance and living a life that I am working towards things that bring me closer to my goals and bring me joy.

I am very glad I have made some of the changes I have lately and it has impacted me in positive ways so far. I have even been able to spend more time with my husband on the weekends while he practices his hobby and I do not feel guilty. I know I have the things done I need to for that day and can bring my crafting with and do something fun and relaxing guilt free.

One other thing that I forgot to message here and I think is so important. ASK FOR HELP! As women, for some reason we hate to ask for help. I think we get it in our head that no one can do it like we can. Get rid of that though right NOW! I learned a long time ago it does not matter if the dishwasher is loaded like I do it, all that matters is the dirty dishes are in the dishwasher. It is one less thing I have to worry about. You have to specifically ask too, if you are asking someone to do something save yourself the trouble and leave out the subtle hints. If you cannot read someones mind they cannot read yours. You want your husband to take the trash out, say to him hey babe can you please take this trash out. Use the exact words of what you want done so whoever you are asking knows what to do!

If you have something you can outsource by all means do that. If you hate cleaning, maybe you can budget and have someone come in and clean. I have thought about this, truth is though I enjoy cleaning. So, I have made the choice that I will live in a little bit dirtier house at times so I can get my writing done and still do the cleaning when I have time because it brings me joy. Never be afraid to hire help, especially if you can afford to.

Now I have a challenge for you. I challenge you to do what I do. Think of things that are causing you too feel pressure. If they are things that you alone are putting the extra pressure on yourself, see if you can find a way to lessen that pressure. Also, find 3 things that you want to focus on for your life that make you happy. Schedule those things and say no to all things that do not aline with those 3 things.

This may cause people to now understand why you do the things you do but that is okay. You live your life how it works for you and do what brings you joy. Do not worry about what others are doing or what they may think about you. You do you my friend and rock you life filled with JOY!

Fear · Uncategorized

Embrace Fear

Did you set a New Years resolution?

I heard this from a few different people that only 8% of people who sets goals for themselves in a new year succeed. When you think of how many people set goals each year that is not many.

I feel I can say with a large amount of confidence, that people have the best of intentions and truly want to make there change that will impact their lives for the better. Why do you think it is, that people have the best of intentions starting a new year and then they fail?

For me it comes down to fear. Whether it be fear of change, fear that someone will judge you, fear you will fail or fear of the unknown. Feeling fear is enough to completely stop anyone from reaching their goals.

I know even myself, I am feeling fear right now as I type this this post. Wondering if this will resinate with anyone. Will someone make fun of me. How many people will judge me because of all the errors I am sure are in this post. I mean I did score high on writing test when I was in high school but that was years ago.

I am choosing to push through this fear. 1. Because I truly do enjoy writing (especially on my new computer) and 2. Because I feel like their is someone out there who needs to hear this message right now. Fear can either hold you back or drive you to be stronger. I am choosing to use it to fuel me to be in that 8% of people that reach their goals in 2020.

My girl, Rachel Hollis, says you can only focus on one dream at a time. While I 100% believe in that, I do have a few things I am focusing on right now and why I think I can make it all work it 2020.

Some of the things I vision for 2020 are this:

  1. Training for my half marathon
  2. Drinking more water
  3. Getting more sleep
  4. Eating all the veggies
  5. Completing craft projects
  6. Reading 1 book a month
  7. Keeping my house clean
  8. Saving money
  9. Paying off debt
  10. Writing my book (side note, this is very scary for me to even put in this post to share with the world)

Here is why I feel this is not too ambitious for me, some of these items go together. I have run a half marathon before and since I have worked out 6 days a week for a while I have already built the fitness habit. This does not mean it is not challenging, it is completely challenging adding running in, trying to get the right amount of training miles done and improve. I have a ways to go but I do have until the end of April so I will get there.

My half marathon, as I said above is in April. That means I only have that for about 3-4 months of 2020. I will continue fitness and running but less miles. Adding items is a little easier for me then removing. I have increased my water and try to make sure at every meal I have a serving of veggies. They are both health related and how I stay motivated to do this is because I feel so much better when I do.

I am crazy about sleep. I aim to get 7.5 hours of sleep every night. Since I get up around 4:30am weekday mornings that does sometimes mean by 7:30-8:00pm I am in bed sleeping. Now I know some week nights I do not get that accomplished. This week some unexpected things came up and since it was bible study week, which is a priority for me, I didn’t get to bed early that night either. It is just all about balance and if I get to bed early most nights of the week, when I go to bet a little later a night here or there it is still manageable. I do try to sleep in on the weekends, but usually my fur babies have my awake by 5:30am if I am lucky. I have transitioned to a morning person over the years so for the most part I do not mind.

The paying off debt and savings kind of go together. I have medical issues so I know my medical bills will cost a lot each year so putting that money in savings right away helps a ton. I do need to cut back on the shopping, but I do also save a lot of money too. My husband and I have a budget for the bills and that also allows us to focus on one bill and pay extra. Some times unexpected bills come up and they extra money goes to that but that is okay. I am just so grateful we have both the money to pay for those unexpected things and for my medical bills out of pocket. It is sad to me sometimes to know my savings is just for that but that is just what I have to expect. Being a person with medical issues it is better to be prepared that way and plan for.

The reading, cleaning and crafting I am putting into the “self care” category so to me that is a easy goal to work on. I have my cleaning that I have to do nightly, with 3 cats in the house and 1 outside they need food and litter boxes scooped daily. I am talking some of the deep cleaning you only get to maybe once a year if your lucky. That I plan to set a side 1-2 nights a week to work on one of them. So some nights it will be I clean something when I have a spare hour, the next night I plan to craft and so on. I also have been taking my crafting with when my husband shoots pool (yep I crochet in a bar lol). This way, I still get to spend quality time with my husband, we tend to make it a date and usually get food before/after and then he practices while I work on my hobby. It actually has been working out great doing and helped me to get some crafting done and not feeling guilty because I should be cleaning. I also only have a couple projects with true “deadlines” which means I can take my time and just enjoy the activity that is relaxing to me.

This is also how I plan to write my book, okay so maybe not taking my laptop with while he shoots pool. Although, that thought has crossed my mind. It has helped that I have a functional laptop again and can take it places if I choose too. I will also set aside time in the mornings or evening during the week and weekends to write. I have a goal to get it finished this year. I still need to work out the logistics of editing and publishing, but if I don’t write the book there will be no need for those items. Once I have a book that is when I will worry about that.

That got long so let me recap really quick. Fear can either hold you back or move you forward. I am choosing, this year to Embrace (my word for this year) fear and have it move me forward. I believe with planning and building habits anything is possible. My gaol list may look long but many of this items work together and I know when I drink my water, eat all the veggies and get all the sleep I have energy to do all of the things. It actually makes me feel like I have more time in my day!

I hope you are having a great 2020 so far and I want you to be in that 8% of people who reach their goals this year!

Embrace Fear!